Tales of a Psychology Major

Sunday, October 23, 2005

I'm a bad person

So it's been forever since I've posted.
Shit happens.
Like my computer eating my seminar paper.
I get to write about tactical deception in animals and the impact that it has on the topic of self awareness.
And my computer killed both copies of it.
I saved in two places, and it didn't do me a damn bit of good.

Everyone keeps telling me that being broke and miserable is one of the best parts of college life. They apparently didn't have rent to pay.
Working while going to college sucks as well.
And these are the best years of my life?
I can't remember the last time I actually got a decent night's sleep.

Send money or food.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

This is a transcript of this complete moron's interview on the Today Show. I bolded the parts where it gets good, so you can skip around before your eyes bleed or you drink bleach.

We asked Cruise to explain his recent comments regarding Brooke Shields. Cruise created a firestorm when he criticized Shields for revealing that she went into therapy and took antidepressants to deal with her postpartum depression. Cruise has said that, as a Scientologist, he doesn't believe in psychiatric medicine.

Cruise: I've never agreed with psychiatry, ever. Before I was a Scientologist I never agreed with psychiatry. And when I started studying the history of psychiatry, I understood more and more why I didn't believe in psychology.

And as far as the Brooke Shields thing, look, you got to understand, I really care about Brooke Shields. I think, here's a wonderful and talented woman. And I want to see her do well. And I know that psychiatry is a pseudo science.

Lauer: But Tom, if she said that this particular thing helped her feel better, whether it was the antidepressants or going to a counselor or psychiatrist, isn't that enough?

Cruise: Matt, you have to understand this. Here we are today, where I talk out against drugs and psychiatric abuses of electric shocking people, okay, against their will, of drugging children with them not knowing the effects of these drugs. Do you know what Aderol is? Do you know Ritalin? Do you know now that Ritalin is a street drug? Do you understand that?

Lauer: The difference is —

Cruise: No, no, Matt.

Lauer: This wasn't against her will, though.

Cruise: Matt, Matt, Matt, Matt —

Lauer: But this wasn't against her will.

Cruise: Matt, I'm asking you a question.

Lauer: I understand there's abuse of all of these things.

Cruise: No, you see. Here's the problem. You don't know the history of psychiatry. I do.

Lauer: Aren't there examples, and might not Brooke Shields be an example, of someone who benefited from one of those drugs?

Cruise: All it does is mask the problem, Matt. And if you understand the history of it, it masks the problem. That's what it does. That's all it does. You're not getting to the reason why. There is no such thing as a chemical imbalance.

Lauer: So, postpartum depression to you is kind of a little psychological gobbledygook

Cruise: No. I did not say that.

Lauer: I'm just asking what you, what would you call it?

Cruise: No. No. — Matt, now you're talking about two different things.

Lauer: But that's what she went on the antidepressant for.

Cruise: But what happens, the antidepressant, all it does is mask the problem. There's ways, [with] vitamins and through exercise and various things... I'm not saying that that isn't real. That's not what I'm saying. That's an alteration of what I'm saying. I'm saying that drugs aren't the answer, these drugs are very dangerous. They're mind-altering, antipsychotic drugs. And there are ways of doing it without that so that we don't end up in a brave new world. The thing that I'm saying about Brooke is that there's misinformation, okay. And she doesn't understand the history of psychiatry. She doesn't understand in the same way that you don't understand it, Matt.

Lauer: But a little bit of what you're saying Tom is, you say you want people to do well. But you want them do to well by taking the road that you approve of, as opposed to a road that may work for them.

Cruise: No, no, I'm not.

Lauer: Well, if antidepressants work for Brooke Shields, why isn't that okay?

Cruise: I disagree with it. And I think that there's a higher and better quality of life. And I think that, promoting — for me personally, see, you're saying what, I can't discuss what I wanna discuss?

Lauer: No. You absolutely can.

Cruise: I know. But Matt, you're going in and saying that, that I can't discuss this.

Lauer: I'm only asking, isn't there a possibility that — do you examine the possibility that these things do work for some people? That yes, there are abuses. And yes, maybe they've gone too far in certain areas. Maybe there are too many kids on Ritalin. Maybe electric shock —

Cruise: Too many kids on Ritalin? Matt.

Lauer: I'm just saying. But aren't there examples where it works?

Cruise: Matt. Matt, Matt, you don't even... you're glib. You don't even know what Ritalin is. If you start talking about chemical imbalance, you have to evaluate and read the research papers on how they came up with these theories, Matt, okay? That's what I've done. Then you go and you say where's the medical test? Where's the blood test that says how much Ritalin you're supposed to get?

Lauer: It's very impressive to listen to you. Because clearly, you've done the homework. And you know the subject.

Cruise: And you should. And you should do that also. Because just knowing people who are on Ritalin isn't enough. You should be a little bit more responsible in knowing really

Lauer: I'm not prescribing Ritalin, Tom. And I'm not asking anyone else to do it. I'm simply saying, I know some people who seem to have been helped by it.

Cruise: But you're saying this is a very important issue.

Lauer: I couldn't agree more.

Cruise: It's very and you know what? You're here on the "Today" show.

Lauer: Right.

Cruise: And to talk about it in a way of saying, "Well, isn't it okay," and being reasonable about it when you don't know and I do, I think that you should be a little bit more responsible in knowing what it is.

Lauer: But

Cruise: Because you communicate to people.

Lauer: But you're now telling me that your experiences with the people I know, which are zero, are more important than my experiences.

Cruise: What do you mean by that?

Lauer: You're telling me what's worked for people I know or hasn't worked for people I know. I'm telling you, I’ve lived with these people and they're better.

Cruise: So, you're advocating it.

Lauer: I am not. I'm telling you in their case, in their individual case, it worked. I am not gonna go out and say, "Get your kids on Ritalin. It's the cure-all and the end-all."

Cruise: Matt, but here's the point. What is the ideal scene for life? Okay. The ideal scene is someone not having to take antipsychotic drugs.

Lauer: I would agree.

Cruise: Okay. So, now you look at a departure from that ideal scene, is someone taking drugs, okay. And then you go, okay. What is the theory and the science behind that, that justifies that?

Lauer: Let me take this more general, because I think you and I can go around in circles on this for awhile. And I respect your opinion. Do you want more people to understand Scientology? Would that be a goal of yours?

Cruise: You know what? Absolutely. Of course, you know.

Lauer: How do you go about that?

Cruise: You just communicate about it. And the important thing is, like you and I talk about it, whether it's okay, if I want to know something, I go and find out. Because I don't talk about things that I don't understand. I'll say, you know what? I'm not so sure about that. I'll go find more information about it so I can come to an opinion based on the information that I have.

Lauer: You're so passionate about it.

Cruise: I'm passionate about learning. I'm passionate about life, Matt.

So, basically...
Tom Cruise. With no education to speak of, the guy who starred in Days Of Thunder (thus losing any rsepect I ever had for him) has decided that psychology is a "psuedo science".
Screw you, Tom Cruise. Screw you. Getting up infront of millions of people and badmouthing psychiatry is irresponsible. You are in a position where thousands of idiots will listen to what you have to say. When you influence people, you had better make sure that your facts are correct.
No such thing as a chemical imbalance, my ass.
You define chemical imbalance. You need anti psychotic medication more than anyone I have ever seen.
I particularly like the part where he claims no one really understands as much as he does.
It makes me feel good.
Knowing I pay $30,000 a year for my education, and I don't understand psych as well as some 5'5'' idiot whos religion was invented by a sci-fi writer.
Way to go, Tom Cruise.
Maybe next you can describe to us why brain surgeons are all quacks, how rocket scientists don't understand physics, and how lawyers simply can't understand law the way you do because you've read something about all the topics one time and apparently really missed the point.
Please. For the sake of everyone.
Just. Shut. Up.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

The Time Is Now 2:13

It's 2:13 AM.
I can't sleep.
My alarm is set for 6:00. I will ignore it, and not work out tomorrow.
Why I am up is beyond me.
My allergies are a mess.
I generally feel like crap.
And there is a test on Friday.
I have a paper due on Thursday.
It is 2:14 AM. God is mocking me.
Sleep is one of the things I am good at.
And I can't do it tonight because I feel icky.
Really, truly icky.
It is 2:15.
I have no sleeping pills.
Stupid Ambien commericals.
If I miss class, it's because I knocked myself unconcious in an attempt to get some rest.
It's 2:16 AM.
I am tired.
I am awake.
Boo.

Monday, June 13, 2005

Why I Need Therapy

This class is going to be the death of me, I swear to god.
I've been mulling over the class discussion in my head for the past hour and a half, and I almost want to explode.
The underlying idea is that females have a finite number of chances to reproduce, thus any trait that ensures the survival of their offspring could very well be the product of a sort of psychological evolution.
Somehow the conversation started in on relationships. To a woman, the thought of her significant other falling in love with another woman is far worse than having unattached, emotionless sex with her. To a man, his significant other falling in love with someone else is not nearly as bad as her having sex with him.
So basically what it boils down to is the idea that women freak out if men fall in love with someone else, and men freak out if women bump uglies with someone else.
This is a seriously disturbing idea to me, because I think it might actually be true.
That was a rough class.
In my mind, there was my significant other. Sweet talking the life sized version of bleach blonde bimbo Barbie. By the time the class ended, I thought my head was going to explode. I'm not entirely sure who exactly she is, but rest assured, someday I will find this girl. And although nothing happened, and this is all my over active imagination, I fully plan on smacking her upside the head.

I'd rather not have to think about these things all the time.

Friday, June 10, 2005

My Foot In The Door and My Hand In Your Wallet

Sometimes our text book really does read like a Retail Sales Guide To Life.
I love it. For a few reasons.
1. I know the general population won't read the text book. This includes most college students, so I can rest assured that the techniques I use on a daily basis will still be effective.
2. It explains two of my favorite techniques for getting myself more commission perfectly.

It is not easy to sell $200 worth of supplements to one customer. I do it constantly. There is something fun about knowing that as soon as I convince you to buy one teeny, tiny, little thing, you might as well hand your wallet over to me.
First thing I'll do is smile at you sweetly. Ask you how your day is, as if I really truly care. Then all I do is show you our neat new product. That's it. My foot is already in the door, and most people don't even know it yet. I convince you that you truly need that multivitamin (what I need are my multivitamin sales to go up). After that, it's smooth sailing. Have you tried our Vitamin C? It compliments the other supplements you take. Try our discount card (I'll spare you the name of it for sake of my employment, but it's gold. Hint hint). It only costs $15 to sign up for it, and you save a certain percent off of purchases you make during a few selected days of every month that you won't remember.

Do I hate it? Yup. Do I feel like a jerk for selling people crap they don't need? Yup.
Will I stop it? Nope. It's amazing that I sleep so well at night.

Maybe our store should carry our text book.
I'd have to be sure to rip out Chapter 4, the last thing I need are my sales going down.

My Dentist is a Nazi

I want to die. Seriously. I went to the dentist yesterday, and I'm pretty sure she tried to kill me. Hammering at my mouth with little chisels, I'm not sure if she was searching for gold or what, but I feel like I was kicked in the teeth.
4 vicodin later, I write this.
Atleast it's over, right?
Wrong.
In my prescription drug induced haze, I realize that I have to miss psych on Tuesday to go let Miss Hitler drill holes into my teeth.
I am not amused with this. Not only does it make me nervous to miss class, especially during the summer, I don't really want to go.
I think dentists are crazy.
How are you today? Really? That's nice. Are you comfortable? Would you like a magazine? If you don't mind I'm going to stab you in the mouth with needles and drill into your teeth. Isn't the weather lovely?
Atleast when I was little, I would get a toy when I left.
Now I get nothing but a big pain in the mouth.
I think I'd rather have a toy.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Am I Dumb?

I have been hunting the public folders all day, and I can't find a single one of the posted exams.
Am I missing them?
Anyone else having issues?

Friday, June 03, 2005

15 things you never wanted to know about me

1. I have a twin sister. She's my exact opposite.
2. I am a music freak. If an album has come out since 1997, I know about it, own it, or can tell you about it. It's a really unhealthy obsession. I have over 4000 CDs.
3. I'm 22 and I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing with my life. Some days I wake up and I'm sure that I've got a great handle on my entire life. Other days I wake up in a panic and seriously question the lack of anti anxiety medications in my apartment.
4. I wake up at 6:09 AM. Every day. My circadian rhythms are a joke.
5. I've hung out with some of the most popular musicians of our time, including but not limited to Zakk Wylde, Maynard James Keenan, Kerry King, Ozzy Osbourne, Godsmack, System of a Down, Limp Bizkit, Eminem, Lucky Boys Confusion, Blink 182, Stereomud, Slipknot, Slayer, Dope, Down, Rob Halford, and Pantera.
6. I didn't have to take my top off to meet them.
7. I only like diced onions. Onions in any other form are disgusting.
8. I'm a vegetarian.
9. In lieu of #8, I still eat peanut butter and bacon sandwiches once a year.
10. I once drove to White Castle in Joliet IL (from the Quad Cities) at 11 o clock at night with my heterolifemate because we were inspired by the movie Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle. We finally got home at 8 AM.
11. I've been bungee jumping 3 times, twice in Mexico and once in Tennessee. I still consider bungee jumping in Teneessee more dangerous, simply because I didn't have the liquid courage required for the task.
12. My favorite color is pink. I know. Never woulda guessed.
13. My greatest talent is by far procrastination. I would've cured cancer by now, but I always had a bunch of other stuff to do.
14. I'm really bad at finishing things.